« The Daily Memo - 11/7/06 | Main | If I’m going to be a legally-declared whore, I’m going to be a single legally-declared whore »
Yakshemash! In US of A, democracy is very different from Kazakhstan. In America, woman can vote, but horse cannot!
As my colleague has already pointed out, today is Election Day — when the fate of the entire free world rests in your hands. No pressure or anything.
Anyway, it didn’t take long for voting irregularities to crop up, suggesting that — no matter who wins — lawsuits are inevitable, both from losing candidates and disenfranchised voters. The AP reports, for instance, that programming errors and inexperience dealing with electronic voting machines frustrated poll workers in hundreds of precincts all over the country:
In Delaware County, Ind., officials planned to seek a court order to extend voting after an apparent computer error prevented voters from casting ballots in 75 precincts. Florida officials, working to avoid a repeat of the vote-counting debacle of 2000, fielded extra voting machines, paper ballots and poll workers. In the Jacksonville suburb of Orange Park, Fla., voters were forced to use paper ballots after an electronic machine broke.
Less publicized problems have also cropped up, including one district in Ohio where voters who selected Democratic candidates received small jolts of electricity when they pushed buttons. In Missouri, where one of the mostly hotly contested Senate elections is taking place today, some voters in heavily Democratic districts found fecal matter on electronic voting machines.
Democrats, however, pulled off the dirtiest trick this election day, somehow convincing President George Bush to stand in front of polling places, offering voters a much-need reminder of who not to vote for.
For those of you anticipating problems with electronic voting machines today, our pals over at Junkiness also offer a couple of helpful tips, including these:
1. Try to avoid being African-American; and2. Rather than waiting in long lines to vote on dubious equipment, Republican supporters would be better off staying at home praying for their candidate to win.
Happy Voting!
