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They’re always after me lucky charms!

prisonbreak.jpgFrom Scotsman.com via Fark.com, let’s give this a shot, folks: The firstest ever Quizlaw Real Time Review!! (patent pending)

A convicted killer has gone on the run from HMP Castle Huntly three months after being transferred to the open prison.

**Oooh, this should be good. Wait, “open prison”? Isn’t that kinda’ contradictory? Oh well…

Tayside Police confirmed George McKay, 55, absconded from the prison, near Dundee, on 10 May.

**”Absconded”…I feel smarter after having read this. Hold on, May 10th? And they’re just reporting this NOW?

He is one of three inmates reported to have gone on the run in the last week.

**So I guess Larry and Moe must still be on the lamb. I hated Schemp…

McKay, originally from Glasgow, was given a life sentence in 1975 after being convicted of murder.

**Natch.

He failed to return to the prison after being granted home leave, but details of his absconding have only now been revealed.

**”Now, listen heerrrr McKay, ya go’ 7 days leave if ya promise tah be a guhd boy and come straight back now, ya go’ it?” (Abscond-2, Scotts-0)

McKay also absconded from Edinburgh’s Saughton Prison 14 years ago.

**This guy’s more slippery than greased haggis
**Abscond-3, Scotts-0

Last night the Tories called for an urgent review of the rate of abscondings from the Dundee prison, one of Scotland’s main open jails.

**This whole “open jails” idea? Not really working that well, is it?
**Abscond-4, Scotts-0

Bill Aitken, the Tory MSP for Glasgow and the Scottish Conservative’s justice spokesman, said: “Open prisons do have a place in the prison estates, but in the case of Castle Huntly, the abscondee rate is far too high and the situation clearly needs to be looked at again.”

**Hold the phone. You mean to say there’s an acceptable abscondee rate?? Someone’s been hitting the pubs a bit too hard, if you ask me.
**Abscond-5, Scotts-0

A spokeswoman for Tayside Police explained that McKay had been transferred to Castle Huntly in February of this year. She continued: “On 3 May he was granted a temporary release license allowing him home leave on the condition he return to Castle Huntly on 10 May.”

**Because we all know that murderers are men of their word, don’t we?I mean, if you can’t trust a homicidal maniac, then the terrorists have alread won.

“Mr McKay failed to return and the prison authorities alerted Tayside Police. Despite extensive police enquiries, Mr McKay has evaded recapture.”

**Ye’ll never catch me Lucky Charms!! Faith and Begora, bastards!!

**Final Score: Abscond-5, Scotts-0.

| Comments (5)


Comments

Isn't Scots? Maybe not, but something just looks off with Scotts...

...not to mention their score.

Monica-We're still trying to work the bugs out of the RTR engine. The Mr. Fusion malfunctioned and didn't calculate the correct number of times "Scot" (and its derivitives) were used. As soon as the flux capacitor is up and running, you'll be the first to know.

These days, I'm not sure when I'm reading Quizlaw or Pajiba, especially when you put a real-time review into Quizlaw. It also doesn't help that, thanks to Pajiba, "greased Haggis" has an entirely different meaning now.

It is 'Scots' not 'Scotts'. 'Scotts is porridge oats brand.

God, how sad am I?

Oh, and, to be deliberately pedantic, Faith and Begorra would be Irish.