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No, Sir, You May Kindly Go F Yourself

cheney_short_of_breath.jpgI used to argue against the occasional unemployment benefits claim as part of my old job, so let me see if I can remember the relevant standard: As I recall, you are entitled to benefits if you are laid off or fired, unless you were fired for misconduct.

It’s that “fired for misconduct” element that applies to the case of Douglas Williams, an employee at a Minnesota car wash. Apparently, what had happened was this: Williams was washing cars, minding his own business, when the sales manager requested that he go clean up the cigarette butts in the parking lot.

Williams, who had the flu that unusually busy day, responded in the manner that many of us might when asked to clean up cigarette butts. He said he was busy and told the sales manager that he should kindly “go fuck himself.”

He was fired for insubordination. And, given the standard, his unemployment claim would seem an open and shut case. Telling one’s boss to “go fuck himself” certainly seems to fit within the definition of misconduct. But the Minnesota Court of Appeals disagreed, granting benefits. The court stated that Williams should “not [be] disqualified from receiving unemployment insurance benefits because his conduct was a single incident that did not have a significant adverse impact on the employer.”

You hear that, folks? As long as it doesn’t have a “significant adverse impact on the employer,” in Minnesota at least, you all have one freebie. So, in honor of Doug Williams, we officially pronounce that today is QuizLaw’s Fuck Your Boss Day. Do yourself a solid, and when your bossman or bosswoman asks you to do something you don’t want to do, tell them to “go fuck themselves.”

You’ll feel better. And if you get fired, rest easy knowing that unemployment benefits will not be deprived.* Besides, you can hardly hold it against Williams – he was just following the moral standard that our vice-president established not so long ago.

* This should not, in any way, be construed as legal advice. Please refer to our disclaimer.

| Comments (3)


Dammit, I can't join in. Technically, my boss is my school, and they hold my degree and my loan deferral in their hands.

In Connecticut, I was on both sides of the unemployment compensation fight.

Their case law requires either one huge, or 3 smaller (within a 6 month period) documented incidents of GROSS misconduct - an entirely other level of bad behavior. For example, negligence isn't enough to get denied benefits.

My boss(es) are at the beach today and tomorrow. So I'm wearing jeans and sneakers for the rest of the week! Yeah, that's what I thought, bitches. This small act of rebellion constitutes as an unspoken "Go fuck yourself" as far as I'm concerned.