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The lesser of two evils

toe-tag.jpgRecently, I was telling folks about this old quandary a high school friend used to hit people with (and be warned - it’s rather foul):

Suppose you’re buried up to your neck in a bucket of vomit. You can’t move, except to lower your head into the vomit. Meanwhile, someone is swinging a large bag of shit at your head. It is guaranteed to burst upon impact. Do you keep your head up and take face full of shit, or do you dip your head into the vomit?

The best follow-up to this I ever heard was when someone asked, “well, is it my shit and vomit?”

Anyway, I could see another variant of this, where one option is that you can have sex with a 92-year-old woman while the other is that you can bone a corpse. Which would you do?

If you’re Anthony Merino, a 24-year-old Teaneck, New Jersey man, you apparently don’t see this as a “lesser of two evils” inquiry and would rather just kill two birds with one stone. Yup — Merino has been arrested for having sex with the corpse of a 92-year-old woman in the local morgue. He’s been charged with a second degree count of desecrating human remains. He’s also expected to undergo a psychological evaluation, which I don’t get. I mean, what sane person wouldn’t want to give a poke to granny’s corpse?

Eeegads.

| Comments (4)


Comments

Reminds me of a little conundrum that a friend of mine hit me with a few years ago.

You're locked in a room with no food or water. You'll die if you don't get out. On one side, there's a dead, but still warm, Carmen Elektra. On the other side is a *very* alive Rosie O'donnell (used to be Starr Jones, but since she no longer ways eight billion pounds, it doesn't work so much).

To get out, you need to have sex with one. Which do you choose?

dead carmen beats live rosie anyday man...

If she's still warm is there even a question here? To make the playing field equal it should be a dead, rotting, maggot covered Carmen Electra.

Heaven forbid anyone would have sex with someone who isn't stick thin. The horror, the horror!