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The Elven Supremacy

keebler.jpgFlorentino Floro Jr. used to be a judge down in the Philippines. But not anymore, because it seems that the country’s Supreme Court was a bit tired of Floro being, uhm, crazy. Specifically, a medical clinic tested Floro and determined that he was actually suffering from psychosis, which explains this whole elf thing.

Floro has been on a campaign to get his job back, claiming that he has magical healing powers and that he will take “ungodly reprisal” against the Philippine Supremes if they don’t let him back. The Supremes have asked him to kindly stop making these threats, as they’re not amused by any of this. They’re particularly not amused by the fact that, get this, “a series of unfortunate incidents have befallen the supreme court justices or their families, including serious illnesses and car accidents.”

Floro refuses to man up and take full credit for these incidents however, instead blaming three elves, including “Luis,” who’s an avenging elf. Floro says that Luis and the other two help him predict the future, and they’re the ones responsible for whatever mishaps have befallen the country’s Supremes.

Oh, and just to clear the air, Roco says “he has never consulted [the elves] when issuing judicial decisions.” Cause that would be crazy.

(Hat tip to The Legal Reader.)