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Oink. Oink.

PIG_TEETH.jpgNot that any of you care, but Nicole Ritchie pleaded guilty to DUI charges today and was sentenced to a whopping four days in jail, which will give her a chance to work on her diet.

Meanwhile, the far more entertaining story today involves a dentist who thought it would be hilarious to stick some phony pig’s tusks in his assistant’s mouth while she was under anesthesia. He took the tusks out before his assistance woke up, but he took pictures, which eventually circulated around the office and were given to the assistant during her office birthday party. So, his assistant — who clearly has absolutely no sense of humor — quit her job and sued the dentist.

But here’s the cool part (at least for this story’s dentist hero): The dentist’s insurance company refused to cover the suit, saying that the joke was intentional and not part of normal business operations. So, the dentist — whose name is Robert Woo — settled out of court for $250,000, then he sued his insurance company and won $750,000!

The ruling was appealed, but eventually upheld by the Washington state supreme court. So, the end result of the dentist’s practical joke was a $500,000 windfall.

And, of course, that’s the way he designed it from the beginning.

Woo’s lawyer, Richard Kilpatrick, described the surgeon as a kindhearted, fun-loving man who was chagrined that an office prank turned out so badly. He was delighted with the high court’s decision, Kilpatrick said.

Yeah. No kidding.