« Crazy like a fox | Main | The Daily Memo - 5/5/06 »
Mmmmmm…pie
One of the few news shows that the QuizLaw folks watch on a regular basis is MSNBC’s “Countdown with Keith Olbermann.” Last month, Keith honored Florida by inducting it, en masse, into the Countdown Hall of Fame:
Florida! Nine hundred-miles of gator taping, doctor shopping, tiger groping, mullet wearing, kitty snatching, Virgin Mary sandwich selling Countdown contributors. When network news anchors want to get whipped around in a storm, they head to Florida. When Vanilla Ice loses his wallaroo, which state does he lose it in? Florida.
When dumb criminal with dumb hairdos get drunk and ride scooters, where does it happen? Florida. When you need a robotic Rasta refrigerator to bring you cool beers, where can you find it? Florida. When Donald trump gets married again, where does he get married? Florida. When Fifi and Toto the dogs get married, where do they get married? Florida. When an Orange County sheriff’s deputy uses an elevator as a port-a-john, Florida. When amateur dentists decide to open a practice in a garage, Florida. When sumo wrestlers go street surfing, get caught and aren’t worried about the charges? …Florida. When are Fidel Castro gets crank called, whose on the line? Florida.
Car chases, blowed up bridges, alligators, sharks, manatees and even Tarzan’s tiger…Florida. Our most favoritest peninsula in the whole wide world including Rangaparoa (ph) Peninsula in New Zealand. When it comes to the news that we here at Countdown use, Florida is numero uno.
Well, in honor of Olbermann, let’s talk about the latest stupid news to come out of Florida. Most states have all sorts of official state “This, That and the Other.” Well, Florida’s about to get pie. Key lime pie is now the official state pie of Florida, unless Governor Jeb Bush refuses to sign the just-passed legislation.
That news is not, in and of itself, what I think is so stupid. What I do think is so stupid, however, is that there was apparently heated debate about whether the nod should go to key lime pie or sweet potato pie. “I can’t understand how anyone in the world can present a bill making a state pie from a fruit that’s not even grown in Florida,” complained one state lawmaker. Another countered with “let’s bring key limes back to Florida - and bring sunshine back to the state.”
Uh, riiiiiight. I’m not sure what the connection is between key lime and sunshine, but big ups to the Florida legislature for doing Olbermann proud yet again and focusing on truly important social issues.
