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Hey, University of Chicago law students — shut up!

crossword.jpgLast month, following Spring Break, the University of Chicago Law School enacted a new policy, banning internet access from all classrooms. According to this report, it’s the first “institution-wide directive of its kind.” Unsurprisingly, many students are up in arms. And to them I say here as I said in this entry’s title, “shut up.” Seriously, shut the fuck up.

I’m going to go old man on you here — back in my day, when we wanted to surf the net instead of pay attention to lectures, you know what we did? We didn’t go to fucking class. It didn’t waste our time, didn’t waste the professor’s time — win fucking win.

And further, if we did want to waste time in class, there were plenty of ways to do it without the internet. Those of us who had laptops would play lots of Freecell or Hearts or Minesweeper. But we didn’t even need the laptops to distract us. In fact, during second year (especially during mother fucking Antitrust), our favorite in-class distraction tended to be crossword puzzles. Sometimes, one of my gang would even think ahead and make copies of the puzzle from the local paper so the whole gaggle of us could whittle our time away filling in words. Crossword puzzles — just as time-wastey as surfing the net, only kinda smarter. And if you want to go the low-brow route, hell, I still remember a buddy who managed to build the most impressive highlighter tower man has ever laid eyes on.

Point being — fuck the net, kids. Expand your minds and think creatively. That’s what law school’s all about in the first place!

| Comments (3)


I guess I'm just jealous that law school is that easy these days. They Socratic method-ed us to death. You always had to be ready. It was exhausting. But, of course, I'm an old timer and I had to walk to law school every day and it was uphill both ways.

And I must be showing my nerd colors, because I instantly thought of net access as a way to access Google Docs to take notes and various search engines to look up what the professor was talking about, or to confirm a counter to his speech before bringing it up after class.

First off, when am I going to find time to read this blog if not in class? Methinks you're ranting against your own best interests here, Seth.

In reality, would I pay more attention if I didn't have the net in class? Absolutely. I'm just hoping my school doesn't take away my chosen method of procrastination.

I don't think this is a first, either. Friends of mine from Vanderbilt told me that the school's wireless network had each of their schedules in the system and wouldn't allow them web access during their scheduled classes. The rest of the time, they had unfettered access. The only time that backfired is if a class was canceled and they wanted to get on the web during the free time.