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A Call to Arms Breasts!

breastfeeding.jpgThe blogosphere is a funky place; you sit around in your pajamas with a bottle of Wild Turkey and a pack of smokes diddling away on your keyboard, sharing your thoughts with a few common minded people, and wouldn’t you know that some dumbass corporate cumbucket comes along and sticks a fork in your ass of good intentions.

Or, that’s what’s happened to The Lactavist, a blog run by a work-at-home mother in small-town Ohio who is trying to defend the right to breastfeed in public. Nothing wrong with that, right? Actually, it’s a pretty amusing blog that manages to be both informative and, at times, pretty goddamn funny. In fact, the Lactavist has taken to creating those omnipresent Cafe Press T-Shirts with her own snarky slogans to further promote the cause and raise money for the Mother’s Milk Bank of Ohio. The T-shirts carry slogans such as: “Milk on Tap,” “That’s My Baby’s Lunch You’re Staring At,” and “Nip/Suck.”

Well, the National Pork Board apparently wasn’t terribly fond of one of the T-shirt slogans, “The Other White Milk.” In fact, they were so displeased that they sent the Lactavist a cease-and-desist letter, demanding that she discontinue selling the questionable T-shirt because it allegedly infringed upon the Pork Board’s trademark on the phrase, “the other white meat.” The letter reads, in part:

In addition, your use of this slogan also tarnishes the good reputation of the National Pork Board’s mark in light of your apparent attempt to promote the use of breastmilk beyond merely for infant consumption, such as with the following slogans on your website in close proximity to the slogan “The Other White Milk.” “Dairy Diva,” “Nursing, Nature’s Own Breast Enhancement,” “Eat at Mom’s, fast-fresh-from the breast,” and “My Milk is the Breast.”

Yes. Apparently, the National Pork Board is under the impression that the Lactavist is attempting to “promote the use of breastmilk beyond merely for infant consumption.” Umm. Is there another class of folks who like breastmilk? Or, as the Lactavist suggests, “Do they think I’m trying to an promote an adult breastfeeding fetish??!”

Pretty ridiculous, right. Well, she has yet to decide how to approach the legal issue and she’s looking for a good pro bono lawyer. Any takers out there? Check out the full account. It’s worth your while.