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Happy Valentine’s Day to Whipped Men Everywhere!

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You know, I’ve known men who were scared of their wives before, but Jorge Alberto Mejia must be married to a helluva frightening lady. Like, a cross between Peg and Ted Bundy. Or Aileen Wuornos. Or that crazy-eyed lady up above staring at you while you read this post (seriously, it looks like she’s about to jump off the web page and gnaw my leg off to get her afternoon protein).

Cause Mr. Mejia went to an awful lot of trouble to avoid pissing his wife off. And I’m not talking about flowers and a few chocolates. I’m talking about false police reports and one motherfucking hell of an elaborate story.

(Take another gander at that lady up above. She’s getting ready to eat your babies.)

You see, Jorge was driving to a casino in his wife’s shiny new 2007 Ford Focus when he accidentally crashed the car. And, I suppose, Mrs. Mejia loved that car. Liked, loved. Jorge was so afraid of how his wife would react, that instead of coming home with his tail tucked between his ass cheeks and offering up a massive apology along with a few scratch tickets to help heal the pain, Jorge called the police and told them that he’d been kidnapped:

Jorge Alberto Mejia, 35, told police two kidnappers held him up at gunpoint at a San Rafael bar Saturday and ordered him to drive to Santa Rosa, California, where he purposely crashed the car into a wall to escape.

Mejia eventually caved to the interrogators and admitted there were no kidnappers. Police are considering charges for filing a false police report. And I’m betting that, right about now, Jorge is hoping like hell the police throw him in the clink. Cause it’s gotta be better than going home and confessing to his wife.

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Comments

Why are her bikini straps photoshopped out?

missmle: Don't know why her straps are photshopped out. Maybe just to let us see more vein. I can assure you the photoshopping wasn't our work - we would've done a better job of it!