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CAUTION: MAY CONTAIN FOOTBALL-LIKE SUBSTANCE

cardinals.jpgFor anyone that both went to law school and follows football religiously, you’re probably intimately familiar with Gregg Easterbrook — senior editor of The New Republic, fellow at the Brookings Institute, and author of ESPN’s Tuesday Morning Quarterback column. He also happens to be the brother of Frank Easterbrook, Chief Judge of the 7th Circuit Court of Appeals. Well, in a 7th Circuit opinion handed down yesterday, Frank’s colleague on the bench, Terence Evans dropped this footnote in drug case (via How Appealing):

Of course, “Monday morning quarterback” is now passe since the advent of “Tuesday Morning Quarterback,” the terrific column regularly posted by Gregg Easterbrook on ESPN.com. See NLRB v. Cook County, 283 F.3d 888, 895 n.5 (7th Cir. 2002). In light of the column and the marquee “Monday Night Football” NFL games from September through December each year, we think the term “Monday morning quarterback,” from now on, should go the way of the drop-kick, the “T” formation, the Statue of Liberty play, and offensive tackles who weigh less than 300 pounds. From now on, a second-guesser should be called a “Tuesday Morning Quarterback.”

While I have a certain appreciation for a judge who drops pop-culture allusions (and kisses up to his superior at the same time!), I think another football term is appropriate here: Punt. As in, why has Gregg Easterbrook punted the same column, slightly rearranged, for years now? If you’ve read one Tuesday Morning Quarterback column, well, you’ve read them all. The guy hasn’t had an original thought since 2005 and barely prepares anymore; he just autokeys in his cute little team nicknames (Lucky Charms, Jersey A, Les Mouflons, etc.), throws up photos of cheerleaders (“Cheerbabe Cheesecake”), spits out a football-related haiku, and offers up his predictions, with which he gives with the same caveat week-after-week: “All Predictions Wrong or Your Money Back,” and then, ironically, chastises half of the league’s teams for punting in non-punting situations. Hey buddy — why don’t you try for the occasional touchdown with your columns, instead of phoning it in week-after-week?

Hmm. As it turns out, this doesn’t really have much to do with the law, does it? I suppose I just needed to air my grievances.

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Hahaha, the AZ Cardinals. My home state's football team. I never expected to see them here!