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Bah Humbug!
This story is already great just for the fact that it’s main character is named Wendell Jerome Herman Rogers II. That’s just a solid name!
Anyways, last year, Rogers the Second was at a Christmas party on Christmas Eve, as many are wont to do at that time of the year. The next morning, Rogers the Second got into a scuffle with his wife in front of their two youngins. What exactly happened is unclear, but it sounds like Rogers the Second is a bit of a scumbum considering he was “charged with family violence, battery and obstructing and hindering a person making an emergency telephone call.”
Finally facing these charges, Rogers the Second received an interesting sentence from Judge Sidney Nation (another fun name). There’s the usual kind of things - he has to pay a $1,000 fine, and he has a 12 month jail sentence which is suspended so long as he completes an anger management course. But Judge Nation threw in one additional component - to make up for the fact that he ruined his family’s Christmas last year, this year Rogers the Second must take his family to a fancy-schmancy Christmas dinner at one of the city’s best restaurants.
Pretty amusing, at first glance. But if you look at it another way, it kinda’ sounds like a court-sanctioned “sorry I beat you honey - I’ll make it up to you by taking you out for steak tomorrow night,” don’t it?
