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It’s “DOE a deer,” not “DO a deer…”

bambi.jpgFucking Wisconsin, man.

That’s where you’ll find twenty-year-old Bryan James Hathaway. Hathaway is currently being charged with a misdemeanor for violating state laws banning bestiality. Rather, to use the technical lingo, “sexual gratification with an animal.” The charge stems from an allegation that on October 11, he was found scrumping a deer.

Oh, and the deer was dead.

Which is where this case gets interesting. Last week, Hathaway’s attorney filed a motion to dismiss, arguing that a dead animal is simply a carcass and therefore isn’t an “animal” in the eyes of the law: “The statute does not prohibit one from having sex with a carcass.” You can read a copy of the motion courtesy of our good friends over at The Smoking Gun.

The judge in the case, who said a decision will be rendered on December 1, says that he’s “a little surprised this issue hasn’t been tackled before in another case.”

What now? The judge is surprised that this is the first case of necro-bestiality? What the hell is going on up there in Cheese Country? I know it gets cold in the winter and all that, but eegads.

By the way, last year, Hathaway pled no contest to shooting a horse with the intention of fucking it!

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I don't know whether to laugh, cry, or vomit.