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Back Away from the Roses, Denny


Denny Kucinich — who’s so crazy he actually makes sense sometimes — may be guided by higher powers. And no, I’m not talking about Jesus.

Democratic presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich has claimed to have seen a UFO, according to Shirley MacLaine in her new book, “Sage-Ing While Age-Ing.”
Kucinich “had a close sighting over my home in Graham, Washington, when I lived there,” the actress, a close Kucinich friend, wrote. “Dennis found his encounter extremely moving. The smell of roses drew him out to my balcony where, when he looked up, he saw a gigantic triangular craft, silent, and observing him.
“It hovered, soundless, for 10 minutes or so, and sped away with a speed he couldn’t comprehend. He said he felt a connection in his heart and heard directions in his mind.”

Those directions? To get the hell away from the crazy lady who talks to trees as politely as possible without incurring the wrath of her former lives. Go sell batshit somewhere else, Shirley. Denny may be certifiable, but his wife is hot, and in the United States of America, that counts of something, damnit.