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The least the cops could’ve done was given him a chance for the hat trick!

drunk-adult.jpgReader Kristin E. asked us to “please cover this story.” Ask and ye shall receive, although there’s really not much to be said aside from simply telling the story, as it quite speaks for itself: A brilliant man in Sheboygan, Wisconsin (Sheboygan!) was busted twice for drunk driving in the span of 2 hours. It was easy for the cops to figure out he was drunk one of the times as the genius was driving the wrong way down a one way-street at 1:50 in the morning. That’ll usually tip the cops off.

The only thing I’m confused about is that I thought it was illegal in Wisconsin to not be drunk all the time. No?

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Lewis Black once said the following about Wisconsin: "I love coming to Wisconsin, I perform here a lot, because I've discovered that apparently you people have some sort of federal grant for drinking. You're insane. I don't know if you're using that farm subsidy money or hijacking liquor trucks, but this is fucking insane. How do you know when it's New Years? That's the big mystery to me. What's the difference? I've been in bars here and it's like New Years every fuck night! Oh, New Years, thats when you drink with hats on. And remember this, you are not, YOU ARE NOT, alcoholics. You are, and my hat is off to you, professionals."