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capt_sge_jrl10_100807062146_photo00_photo_default-341x512.jpgJust when I thought today would be a slow day for legal news, get this: Brad Pitt reported to jury duty yesterday. He’s just like us, y’all! I bet he even goes to the DMV. I understand he had Subway for lunch. I have Subway for lunch sometimes, too! We’re, like, the same person. Me and Brad Pitt. I bet he even gets the turkey and ham with provolone, toasted, too. Who knew we had so much in common? TMZ even said he only showed after asking for a couple of extensions, first — me too! me too! You know what? I bet his shit stinks, too! We’re like brothers, man. Brothers! We should totally hang out, Brad and I. We’d have so much to talk about. Jury duty. Subway sandwiches. Being carbon-based life forms. Oh, it’d be a blast.

Oh, Happy Day! Happy Day!