« The Daily Memo - 11/8/07 | Main | I Got Duped! »

Bill O’Reilly Edges Out Big Bird as “Gayest” Ever

story_26592.jpgIn a poll conducted by Out Magazine, which I assume is a magazine geared toward outdoorsman, readers have been asked to vote in the Gaybies to determine who is the gayest man “ever.” The results are so unsurprising as to not really merit attention, but it’s a slow news day, and sometimes obvious stories are all I can dig up. Anyway — duh — readers voted Bill O’Reilly the gayest person ever. And you know that outdoorsman know better than anyone else who is gay or not.

Last I looked, O’Reilly was polling at around 44 percent, far ahead of both Zac Efron and Big Bird, whose relationship with Mr. Snuffleupagus has always seemed slightly suspect (I understand the Big Bird and Mr. S often attend key parties with Bert and Ernie).

But, damnit — the other day, when I suggested that it’d be nice if a normal Republican in a decent, loving relationship with another man came out of the closet, Bill. O. is not who I had in mind. That dude is pervier than Crispin Glover at a whorehouse dungeon. He is just about the last man alive I’d want to be left in a room alone with a falafel.